The Past Two Years: What Were We Thinking?

Getting Things Done
Greetings all, Steve here. Wow, has it been two years? Yes, it has. Doug asked us to share with you our five favorite columns from the past two years, but I wanted to do more than that. The past two years have left their mark on all of us who worked on this site, something that over time will gradually dim, provided we can obtain the correct psychiatric drugs.

I've learned many things in the past two years, knowledge borne out of personal experience and court-ordered community service. I'd like to share both my favorite columns from the past two years and some things that I've learned, things that I've done and had done to me. Maybe just the first three.

I selflessly donated my time to The Association Of Gay Dyslexic Irish-Canadian Steelworkers. They gave it back.

One of my favorite columns, and one of my most popular, is Storyboarding Your Day. Despite having little experience, rudimentary drawing techniques and the organizational skills of a dense 5 year old, this column managed to make get mentioned on Lifehacker. Yes, I was mentioned on Lifehacker. Strangely, my only mention there to date.

Mexican jalepeno salsa is not an appropriate condiment for bran muffins.

My first Christmas column, How Doug Stole Christmas, expressed both my need to bring a sense of cultural inclusiveness to this international site and to embarrass Doug in front of hundreds of thousands of people. I'd like to state for the record that this was a group effort, involving both Doug's wife Jenny and his friend Brad Reid. Actually, the best thing about this review column is that I now get to embarrass him all over again. :)

If, out of a desire to contribute to society, you join a group called Klingons For The Proliferation Of Bible Study, you deserve what you get.

I felt that it was important to give full vent to my frustrations from working in retail and to give a voice to this underrepresented group in Efficiency In Retail or How Not To Kill Your Customers. My basic premise, which I believe still holds true now, is that working retails sucks. Big time. Totally. Dude. Read and decide for yourself.

I took some con-ed courses at the local college, including How To Achieve Complete Inner Happiness By Becoming A Dangerous Lunatic, How To Find A Sugar Daddy In Wyoming, How To Feel Better About Your Total Lack Of Progress Through Finger Painting and How To Snuggle With An Angry French Person. I like to think that if there's one thing we've shown time and again on this site, it's that personal growth is a life-long pursuit.

After my 30th birthday, I decided to act more grown-up and purchase a computer desk, to improve my work efficiency. I chose a pre-fab desk designed so that anyone could assemble it in minutes. My tragic misadventure and near death are documented in Efficiency in the Home, or Watch Out for Swedish Furniture.

Believing that I needed to give back to the community, I joined several community groups including, The Association Of Badly Thought Out Ideas, The League Of People Who No Longer Give A Rat's Ass and, inspired by this site, Organizing People, Whether They Like It Or Not. Don't thank me, just send cash.

Finally, and perhaps closest to my heart, is my column The Horrors Of Helpful Telephone Support. I suppose this is closest to my heart, because I have spent so many hours of my young life talking to technical support people who utterly failed to support me technically.

Not wanting to get out of shape as I aged, I joined The Chubby Cheetahs, a competitive mall-walking team. You have to take care of yourself people. No one will do it for you.

All right, well that's it for my 2-year review. Tune in next week when, for the first time in two weeks, I have to think of something original to say. Until then, keep your pen on the page and sign up for How To Make People Like You, Even If You're Short.

Steve Sharam
www.whenrealityknocks.com

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Jalapeno salsa on bran muffins?

That's good eats right there, I tell you what. Then again, I'm rather fond of eating raw jalapenos, guess it helps that I am Mexican, nu?

Could be

Could be, could be. I ate a raw jalapeno once and I cried for half an hour:P

Pyramidiology: What you get when you mix pyramids and idiots.

Steve Sharam
www.whenrealityknocks.com

Great Read

Unfortunately I don't contribute to this site often, or at all for that matter, but your post inspired me to chime in. After all the posts I have read today, from numerous forums, your's has to be the funniest I have read. Great info to humor ratio, in a sort of Robin Williams vibe. Or is it Woody Allen. Not sure, but either way, great work. lol.

Hey, a compliment's a compliment

Robin Williams or Woody Allen. Hey, I'll take it any way I can get it man:P

Steve Sharam
www.whenrealityknocks.com